Your Nervous System Is Probably Overwhelmed (But It Doesn’t Have To Be)

If you’ve ever taken a yoga class with me, or received an energy healing session, or attended one of my workshops, you may already know a little bit about the nervous system. The nervous system is like a network that relays messages between the brain and our other bodily systems. 

The nervous system plays a huge role in our stress response. And you may also know that sometimes, our nervous systems can get pretty overwhelmed, which can make us feel all kinds of crappy, ranging from anxious and irritable to numb, bored, or hopeless.

Here’s a little evolutionary neurobiology for you…

You’ve probably heard of fight/flight/freeze in response to stress. The fight/flight response kicks in when we’re in a stressful situation and our subconscious brain believes that we can successfully escape that situation, either through fighting or running away. 

The fight/flight response is at play when you feel…

• Anxious about saying the wrong thing in a job interview.

• Worried that your sick family member isn’t going to recover from surgery.

• Afraid that the shadow you saw out of the corner of your eye was someone following you.

• Frustrated that your partner once again forgot to load the dishwasher.

• Angry that some asshole took an illegal turn and nearly hit you.

On the other hand, the freeze response kicks in when we’re in a stressful situation and our subconscious brain believes that our best chance of survival is to become immobilized and play dead.

The freeze response is at play when you feel…

• Stuck on the couch, exhausted, unable to get up.

• Zoned out scrolling through Instagram.

• Paralyzed, frozen with indecision.

• Overwhelmed to the point of numbness and unable to feel.

• So anxious that you literally can’t move or speak.

My guess is that most, if not all, of the above situations sound pretty familiar to you. It’s not an overstatement to say that stressful experiences like the ones I’ve just listed are a completely normal aspect of modern life.

And yet… it’s ALSO true that these so-called “normal” experiences—or at least, the way that we typically process these experiences—are burning us out.

Burnout is an intense form of physical and emotional exhaustion that happens when you're unable to keep up with life's incessant demands.

Why is burnout so prevalent these days? Because our brains and nervous systems did not evolve to process stress at the frequency or consistency that we experience stressors in modern life. 

We evolved to experience a lot of stress all at once, then to either get mauled, eaten, or… to run away, recover, shake it off (literally) and move on with our lives.

We did NOT evolve to navigate a constant stream of stressors. Our ancient ancestors were not simultaneously juggling family drama, financial troubles, conflicts with coworkers and neighbors, a global pandemic, health insurance denying their claims, being stuck in traffic, seatmates not wearing facemasks on flights, tech glitches, or the entire INTERNET… all in the same day or week. 

It’s no wonder that so many of us in the modern world are so damn stressed out and burnt out. Our brains and nervous systems literally did not evolve to handle the demands of modern life.

The good news? We DO have a decent amount of control over how we deal with our own stress.

Our bodies, brains, and nervous systems just need a little bit of specialized support to process that stress, heal our burnout, and come back to an internal sense of balance.

This is exactly why I created Somatic Summer Sessions and Boundaries for Burnout. 

Two offerings. 

One highly personalized one-on-one coaching experience.

One supportive, intimate, group coaching and teaching container.

Both are designed to help you feel less stressed and overwhelmed, and a lot more relaxed, confident, and capable… so you can actually enjoy this life you’ve worked so hard for.

Get all the details right here.

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Boundaries Are Not What You Think

When you hear the word “boundary,” what do you think of? You might think of a wall or some other barrier (either literal or metaphorical) that secures your personal or energetic space and keeps everyone else out.Or you may think that a boundary is about controlling other people’s behavior, to ensure that they follow rules that have been agreed upon in the relationship.Or you might think of a limit—specifically, the absolute limit of what you are willing to tolerate in a given relationship or situation.Or you may think of a line where you end and other people (and their expectations) begin. And if you’re like a lot of people, you might think that boundaries are about saying “no” to other people, and therefore that they disconnect you from other people.

I am here to tell you that a boundary is none of those things.

A boundary is not a wall.A boundary is not even a limit.And a boundary is definitely not about other people.

I want to offer you a radical, life-changing, paradigm shift: 

A boundary is the energetic expression of your authentic self as it relates to honoring your needs, desires, values, and priorities.If that sentence isn’t landing with you (don’t worry, I won’t be offended), read on.

Here are some things that are true about boundaries:

Our boundaries are in service to our needs. They are what protect and support our needs in practice.Boundaries are 100% about you and your needs, wants, desires, values, and priorities… and 0% about other people or their behavior.Boundaries are about saying “yes” to something true, authentic, and alive within you.Boundaries are emergent. They emerge naturally as an expression of inner truth and are ever-changing as our needs and circumstances change.Boundaries are the container of trust in which connection and intimacy (across all types of relationships) occur joyfully and consensually. Honoring our own boundaries is an essential aspect of respecting, trusting, and partnering with ourselves.When we override our own boundaries—which may look like ignoring or not attending to our fundamental needs (physical, emotional, mental, spiritual, etc…), or acting against our own values or priorities—is when we get burnt out. And finally, importantly…Burnout cannot happen when we are in integrity with our boundaries.In other words, if you’re feeling overworked, overwhelmed, exhausted, and/or burnt out, there’s a boundary issue at play.We’ll be digging into all this and more during Boundaries for Burnout: Four Weeks to Becoming More Resourced & Resilient as part of my Self-Care Summer Programming. I hope you’ll join us!

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